Empaths are incredibly sensitive people who are often attracted to narcissists because of their intense level of inner turmoil. The narcissist is looking for someone to focus on their needs and desires, that’s what they see in the empath. 

While there are many ways in which an empath can impact a narcissist, and some of those will produce change, the truth is that real change has to come from within. An empath can insist that a narcissist treat them more kindly, but that doesn’t mean that real change has occurred. That’s why it’s better for empaths to focus on their own needs. 

Read on to learn more about the specifics of the narcissist/empath relationship and 11 ways that an empath can change a narcissist.

How Do Narcissists Affect Empaths?

Empaths are individuals who have a deep sense of empathy and are highly attuned to the emotions of others. They are often described as sensitive, nurturing, and caring individuals who have an innate ability to connect with others on an emotional level. 

According to Harvard medical doctor Helen Reiss, “Empathy plays a critical interpersonal and societal role, enabling sharing of experiences, needs, and desires between individuals and providing an emotional bridge that promotes pro-social behavior”.

On the other hand, narcissists are individuals who exhibit a range of personality traits such as arrogance, entitlement, and a lack of empathy. They are often described as self-centered individuals who have an inflated sense of self-importance and a need for constant attention and admiration.

When empaths and narcissists come together, it can create a complex and often toxic relationship. Narcissists thrive on attention and admiration, which the empath provides in abundance. They see the empath as a source of narcissistic supply, a term used to describe the validation and attention that narcissists seek from others.

This dynamic can often lead to emotional abuse and trauma for the empath. Narcissists tend to manipulate and exploit empaths to fulfill their own needs, resulting in feelings of exhaustion, confusion, and low self-worth in the empath. This can create a cycle of abuse that is difficult to break.

Empaths often struggle to break free from these toxic relationships due to their strong emotional connection to the narcissist. They may feel a sense of responsibility to “fix” or “heal” the narcissist, which is often not possible due to the narcissist’s unwillingness to seek help or change their behavior.

What is the Challenge of Changing a Narcissist?

Changing a narcissist is a daunting task and one that many people may believe is impossible to achieve. This video explains more about why. This is because narcissistic personality disorder is a complex and deeply ingrained condition that is difficult to treat.

However, with the right approach and a commitment to personal growth, it is possible to help a narcissist change their behavior and develop greater empathy.

One of the primary challenges of changing a narcissist is their lack of empathy. Narcissists are unable to understand or connect with the emotions of others, which makes it difficult for them to recognize the impact that their behavior has on those around them. They are also often unwilling to admit when they are wrong, which can make it difficult to explore the underlying causes of their behavior.

Another challenge is the fact that many narcissists do not believe that they have a problem. This is due to their inflated sense of self-importance and their belief that they are always right. They may view their behavior as normal or even desirable and may not see any need to change.

According to Medical News Today, “Many people occasionally behave in narcissistic ways. Whether a person can change this behavior depends on what is causing it and whether the person wants to change”.

If a narcissist is willing to seek help, it is important to find a therapist who specializes in treating narcissistic personality disorder. This type of therapy involves exploring the underlying causes of the disorder, such as childhood trauma or a lack of emotional regulation skills, and developing healthier coping mechanisms. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) are two common treatment options for narcissistic personality disorder.

Ultimately, the most effective way to change a narcissist is to encourage them to take responsibility for their behavior and develop a greater sense of empathy. This can involve setting firm boundaries and holding them accountable for their actions while also providing support and encouragement as they work towards personal growth.

How Can an Empath Recognize a Narcissistic Person?

Empaths are people who are highly attuned to the emotions and needs of others. They have a deep sense of empathy and compassion, and they often find themselves drawn to helping others in need.

However, this strong sense of empathy can also make empaths vulnerable to narcissists, who are skilled at manipulating emotions and exploiting others for their own gain.

If you are an empath, it is important to be able to recognize the traits of a narcissist in order to protect yourself from potential harm. Here are some common signs that you may be dealing with a narcissistic person:

• They have a sense of entitlement 

Narcissists often believe that they are special and deserve to be treated differently from others. They may demand special treatment or privileges based on their perceived status or power.

• They lack empathy

Narcissists are often unable to understand or connect with the emotions and needs of others. They may appear to be charming or charismatic on the surface, but they are ultimately focused on their own needs and desires.

• They seek attention and admiration

Narcissists crave attention and approval from others. They may go to great lengths to be the center of attention or to be admired for their accomplishments.

• They are manipulative

Narcissists are skilled at manipulating others to get what they want. They may use guilt, shame, gaslighting, triangulation, projection, or other tactics to get others to do their bidding.

• They are unwilling to take responsibility

Narcissists often refuse to accept responsibility for their actions or mistakes. They may blame others for their problems or shift the blame onto someone else.

If you have identified a narcissistic person in your life, it is important to set appropriate boundaries and protect yourself from their toxic behavior. This may involve limiting contact with them or seeking support from a therapist or other mental health professional.

Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and empathy, and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

What are the Ways an Empath can Change a Narcissist?

It’s no secret that relationships involving narcissistic personalities and empathetic individuals can be incredibly challenging. Narcissists possess a sense of entitlement and lack of empathy that can make them difficult to deal with, while empaths tend to be highly sensitive to the needs and emotions of others. This combination can create a toxic dynamic that is detrimental to the mental and emotional well-being of the empath.

So, what can an empath do to change a narcissist? The reality is that changing a narcissistic personality is no easy feat, and even though an empath can destroy a narcissist, as seen in this video, that’s not the same as true change.

It requires a willingness on the part of the narcissist to acknowledge their unhealthy behavior and make conscious efforts to change it. However, there are some steps that empaths can take to encourage their narcissistic partner to grow and evolve. Here are 11 ways an empath can make a narcissist change: 

1. Establish and Set Your Boundaries

One of the most important steps is to establish and maintain strong boundaries. Narcissists are often skilled at pushing the limits and manipulating those around them for their own benefit.

Empaths, on the other hand, tend to be more accommodating and may struggle to uphold boundaries. Setting firm boundaries and sticking to them is crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship with a narcissistic partner.

2. Good Communication is a Must!

Another crucial step is to communicate openly and honestly with the narcissistic partner. This can be challenging, as narcissists often struggle with cognitive empathy and may not understand the emotional impact of their actions. However, sharing one’s feelings and perspective can help the narcissist understand the impact of their behavior and potentially inspire them to make changes.

3. Build Your Emotional Resilience

Empaths can also focus on building their own emotional resilience and self-care practices. This can involve seeking support from loved ones, practicing self-compassion, and engaging in activities that bring joy and fulfillment. By prioritizing their own well-being, empaths can better navigate the challenges of a relationship with a narcissistic partner.

4. Creating Firm Rules and Expectations for Behavior

Creating firm rules and expectations for behavior is a key step in maintaining a healthy relationship with a narcissistic partner. When dealing with a partner who exhibits narcissistic traits, it can be difficult to navigate the complexities of their behavior and set realistic expectations for how they should treat you. 

However, by establishing clear boundaries and rules for acceptable behavior, empaths can create a sense of stability and predictability in their relationships. This helps the narcissist know what to expect. 

5. Enforce the Rules

At the core of setting firm rules and expectations is the willingness to enforce them consistently. This can be challenging when dealing with a partner who is skilled at manipulation and may try to push boundaries. However, it is important to stand firm and not compromise on your expectations for how you should be treated.

One effective way to establish rules and expectations is through open and honest communication. This can involve having a conversation with your partner about what behaviors are not acceptable and what actions should be taken if those boundaries are crossed. It may also be helpful to write down these rules and expectations to ensure that both parties have a shared understanding of what is expected.

6. Use Visual Reminders and Cues

In addition to communication, visual reminders, and cues can also be effective in reinforcing boundaries and expectations. This can include a list of rules posted in a visible location or a designated “time out” space where you can retreat if you feel overwhelmed or unsafe.

7. Reject Unacceptable Behaviors and Attitudes

As an empath in a relationship with a narcissist, it can be incredibly difficult to set and enforce boundaries. Narcissists are notorious for their sense of entitlement and lack of empathy, which can often lead to abusive and toxic behaviors.

One of the most important things you can do as an empath is to reject any behaviors or attitudes that are not acceptable to you. This means actively standing up for yourself and saying no to any actions or words that violate your boundaries or make you uncomfortable.

8. Take Action When Bad Behavior Escalates

It is also important to pay attention to any red flags or warning signs that may indicate an escalation in abusive or toxic behavior. This could include verbal or physical threats, manipulation tactics, or other forms of narcissistic abuse. 

If you notice any of these behaviors, it is important to take immediate action, whether that means seeking support from friends or family members or contacting a professional for assistance.

9. Prioritize Your Emotional and Physical Safety

Another important aspect of rejecting unacceptable behaviors and attitudes is to prioritize your own emotional and physical safety. This means creating a safe space for yourself where you feel emotionally and physically secure. It may mean taking time away from your partner, avoiding certain triggers, or seeking professional help to cope with trauma or emotional abuse. 

10. Understand That Change May Not Be Possible

As an empath, it can be difficult to come to terms with the fact that you may not be able to change a narcissistic partner. It is important to recognize and accept that change may not be possible, despite your best efforts to promote growth and transformation.

Narcissistic personality disorder is a complex and deeply ingrained condition. Narcissistic traits may be so deeply ingrained that it becomes virtually impossible to change them, no matter how much effort is put into trying to do so.

Furthermore, narcissistic individuals may not see any issue with their behavior or attitudes, as they often view themselves as superior to others and feel entitled to special treatment and attention. This means that they may be resistant to change and unwilling to engage in any kind of therapy or personal growth work.

11. Be Willing to End the Relationship

In some cases, it may be necessary to end the relationship altogether, as staying in an abusive or toxic partnership can have severe emotional and psychological consequences. It can be difficult to end a relationship, especially if you have invested a significant amount of time and emotion into it.

However, it is important to prioritize your own safety and well-being and to recognize that ending the relationship may be the healthiest choice in the long run.

9 Tips to Protect Yourself From a Narcissist

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be a soul-sucking experience for an empath. As an empath, your natural inclination may be to prioritize your partner’s needs and emotions over your own, but in a relationship with a narcissist, this can quickly become a toxic pattern. Here are some ways that an empath in a narcissistic relationship can protect themselves:

1. Establish Strong Boundaries

Setting firm boundaries is, as this video explains, essential when dealing with a narcissistic partner. This means being clear about your own needs and feelings and communicating them assertively.

Understand that a narcissist may try to manipulate or gaslight you into doubting yourself or your boundaries. Stay strong and stick to your boundaries, even if it means standing up to your partner or walking away from the relationship altogether.

2. Recognize the Signs of Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse can come in many forms, including emotional, psychological, and even physical abuse. It’s essential to recognize the signs of narcissistic abuse, such as belittling, controlling behaviors, manipulative tactics, and gaslighting. If you suspect that you are being abused by your partner, reach out for support and help from a trusted friend or a professional therapist.

3. Find Emotional and Physical Safety

In a relationship with a narcissist, you may feel as though your emotions and well-being are not being prioritized. It’s crucial to find emotional and physical safety, whether that means seeking therapy, creating a support network of friends and family, or even planning an exit strategy from the relationship.

4. Prioritize Self-Care

Taking care of yourself is vital when dealing with a narcissistic partner. Make sure to prioritize self-care practices that nourish your body and mind, such as exercise, meditation, deep breathing, or self-reflection. Remember that you are not alone, and there is help and support available for navigating the challenges of a narcissistic relationship.

It’s also important to regularly get out into nature, where you can recharge your batteries and find the peaceful solitude that helps you feel refreshed. Toxic people are often energy vampires, and to reenergize yourself, you need to engage in self-care activities that enrich your soul.  

5. Cultivate Healthy Relationships Outside the Relationship

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be emotionally draining and isolating. However, it is crucial to maintain healthy relationships outside of this toxic dynamic. Building a support network of friends and family can provide a sense of emotional safety and offer a sounding board for your experiences.

Cultivating new friendships is easier said than done, but it is essential to prioritize your emotional well-being. Consider joining a local club or volunteering for a cause you’re passionate about. This can help you connect with like-minded individuals who share your values and interests.

6. Maintain Existing Relationships

It’s also important to maintain existing relationships with friends and family members who may have fallen by the wayside during the narcissistic relationship. Make time to catch up with old friends, and try to be present and engaged when spending time with loved ones. Authentic connections with people who care about your well-being can help to counterbalance the emotional turmoil you may experience with a narcissistic partner.

7. Talk to Other Empaths

It’s also very helpful if you can seek out other empathic people to get their support and perspectives on balancing your talent for helping others with your own needs. They can help you work through difficulties with the dysfunctional behavior you might be experiencing, as well as your own proclivity for forming a trauma bond with your abusive partner. 

Sometimes, you need someone who understands what it’s like to be an empath and who is objective enough to see when you might be succumbing to abusive behavior. They can help you determine what a healthy boundary is and when someone has crossed a line. 

8. Practice Self-Love and Compassion

Finally, it’s vital for an empath to continuously practice self-love and compassion. Being compassionate and caring about others is something you can only sustain if you are equally as compassionate and caring about yourself. 

Respect your own inner boundaries so that you can give yourself the things you need to feel safe, peaceful, respected, and loved. As an empathetic person, you need to provide yourself with the same empathy that you so readily give to other people. 

9. Seek Professional Help

Additionally, seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor can be helpful in developing healthy communication skills and processing the trauma of the relationship. It can be challenging to rebuild trust in yourself and others after enduring a narcissistic partner’s abuse, but with the right support, it is possible.

Final Thoughts

As an empath, you understand the emotions and pain that other people are experiencing, and because you are so compassionate, you want to help. That’s a wonderful gift, but to really make the best use of it, you need to take care of yourself. 

While you can change a narcissist in some ways, they have to truly want to change to heal themselves. Without that, there’s nothing you can do, and as hard as it may be, you must accept that reality to protect yourself from an abusive relationship.