The relationship between narcissists and empaths is interesting. They are often attracted to one another because empaths can see the internal struggle of the narcissist. They want to help the narcissist heal their pain. To help, they focus on the narcissist’s needs, which is exactly what the narcissist wants from someone. That’s often why they come together, but can one hurt the other? 

If an empath is healthy and understands their gift, they will call the narcissist out. The narcissist sees the empath as an easy victim, but when they realize the ability of the empath to see through them, they often become afraid of them. Empaths can destroy the narcissist’s egoic consciousness.

If you’re an empath, you know how it feels to sense the emotional pain of other people. It’s important to understand more about the nature of the attraction between empaths and narcissists so you can avoid becoming a victim of a narcissist’s toxic energy. Read on to learn more about why empaths are so often attracted to narcissists, why narcissists come to fear them, and how to take care of yourself in such a relationship. 

Why Might Narcissists Fear Empaths?

Empaths are highly sensitive people who have the ability to sense emotional turmoil in other people. They are often attracted to narcissists because they can see through their facade to the hurt child inside the narcissist. 

Empaths are also extremely compassionate people who love to help other people heal their inner turmoil, and they see an opportunity to do that for the narcissist. This is part of what attracts an empath to a narcissist. 

It’s also a good deal for the narcissist because the empath is focused on them, and that’s exactly what they want. They want someone who will focus on their needs, and to the narcissist, that is what the empath seems to be doing. 

The empath, however, is not focusing on the same needs that the narcissist wants them to focus on. They are seeing the damaged child inside the narcissist and trying to help them heal that pain. When the narcissist realizes the empath can truly see through them, they begin to fear them. 

They start to see that the empath can see past their false self-image to what the narcissist believes is a worthless true self-image. This is what the narcissist fears so much. They don’t want anyone to be able to see that because they fear they will be exposed to the world. 

Moreover, the empath has the ability to not only see the damaged sense of identity inside the narcissist, but they are also willing to call the narcissist out for their delusional thinking. They have no compunction about telling them that they see the fragile self-esteem inside. 

Empaths have the ability to sense the true feelings behind the bravado the narcissist is putting out there. They are willing to say so as well, and that is something that terrifies the narcissist. 

Can an Empath Destroy a Narcissist?

An empath can destroy the narcissist’s egoic consciousness by calling attention to their abusive tactics. When a narcissist is confronted with the reality of their abusive behavior, they usually erupt in a rage. 

This rage, however, is little more than a distraction designed to take the empath’s attention off of their manipulation. When that rage subsides or is met with staunch resistance on the part of the empath, the narcissist changes tactics. 

It can cause the narcissist to suffer a narcissistic collapse. This could potentially lead to healing, but more often the narcissist will discard the individual they fear. If the narcissist is forced to wake up to the reality of their personality disorder, they might be open to healing. 

Unfortunately, that rarely happens. Instead, they are more likely to run away from the empath they perceive as a threat. That doesn’t mean, however, that they will be gone forever. Narcissists often cycle through the people in their life. 

Can All Empaths Frighten Narcissists in This Way?

The empath in a relationship with a narcissist has to be extremely careful because the narcissist can hurt them too. Narcissists are like emotional vampires, and if an empath is not a healthy individual who is aware of their abilities, the narcissist can suck them dry. 

Empaths who are not aware of their nature can easily become codependent in relationships with narcissists. The narcissist will take advantage of all they have to offer and expect even more. The unaware empath will try to comply, not realizing that they are simply sensing those underlying emotions. 

That’s why not all empaths can frighten narcissists. It takes an empath who is aware of their abilities and who prioritizes their own needs to ensure they get sufficient downtime. If an empath is healthy and aware, however, they will make the narcissist fearful. 

As Dr. Amy Saltzman notes, however, that, “Narcissists are only afraid of empaths who recognize their narcissism and call out their abuse.” If an empath is not cognizant of their abilities and able to see through the manipulation, it can be devastating for them to be involved with a narcissist. 

Empaths have a wonderful gift to sense the emotional distress and needs of other people, but they have to learn how to control their gift in a way that won’t cause them any damage. They need to control when and how they are exposed to emotionally distressed people and learn techniques to effectively process the emotions they take on that come from other people. 

How Can an Empath Protect Themselves from a Toxic Narcissist?

It’s vital for an empath who is around a narcissist to take good care of themselves. This means they will need to do several things to avoid being manipulated and taken advantage of by the narcissist. Let’s look at some of the things they will need to do: 

Set Strong Boundaries

One of the first things an empath absolutely must do to avoid the manipulation of a narcissist is set strong boundaries. They will need to enforce every boundary violation every time as well. It’s vital to avoid becoming a victim of narcissistic abuse. 

Get Time Away

Another vital thing the empath must do is get time away from the narcissist. Whether that means spending time with friends and family or just walking alone in nature, it’s critical to get time away so you can process your feelings and recharge your batteries. 

Prioritize Self-Care

It’s also important to prioritize self-care, particularly for an empath. You need time to do the things that help you stay calm and healthy, both physically and mentally. Take time to exercise, meditate, and do anything else that helps you stay healthy. 

Final Thoughts

Narcissists will tell you they are not afraid of anything or anyone, but the truth is that empaths have the ability to scare them. Empaths can see through the seemingly impenetrable outer shell into the hurt child inside. They want to help them, but that is a difficult and rarely successful endeavor. For empaths around a narcissist, it’s vital that they are aware of their own abilities and have healed their own emotional trigger wounds. 

I have created a 5 Step Roadmap to Heal Emotional Triggers that can help you heal those old wounds so that a narcissist can’t manipulate you. To receive a free copy of this handy guide, just click on this link. I’ll send it directly to your inbox.